Homecoming of the Soul

For many decades I have been experiencing a simmering feeling of emptiness inside. As if there was something very valuable missing in my life. Always on the search for that one missing piece. In my work, friend- and relationships. Digging deeper and deeper, until I hit rock bottom on many occasions. People never really understood why I was digging so deep. Again and again.

Since I was a little girl, my journey has been one great adventure. My path is paved with winding roads, steep mountains, forests filled with large trees and sometimes a rocky environment. My 'start' was a very traumatic experience. While I was still in my mother's womb, my twin sister decided to leave and go back home. Leaving me - to be born alone - in this realm on Earth. Which left a big empty space in my heart. An overall feeling of being abandoned and unworthy became my unconscious Mantra.

What I didn't know at that time is that my twin sister' Spirit never left my side. She has been with me ever since. As my guardian, teacher and helper. Cheering me on!

During my last Sacred Soul Journey, it became clear that our Soul's connection has been there much longer. In an earlier lifetime, she was my daughter and I her mother. Our women ancestry's lineage is a long line of suppression, child loss, physical and emotional violence. Probably why 'we' were connected to this family and my Soul incarnated in Doriene' body. To rebalance and clear long lasting Karmic baggage.

My mother suffered from a broken heart, before I was born. Since she had decided to break up with the man she loved (my biological father). She wanted to name me after him. DoRien. On the day that I would receive my name, the man I called my father in life, decided to add an 'e' at the end. And so my name became Doriene Laurine. Because of her grief, she was unable to really bond with me. What was essential for my development as a child. And one of the occasions where my soul was split up in several parts, to be able to carry this intense childhood pain.

Although this was not a voluntary option for her, the Spirit of my twin sister Dyanna took over our Mothers' role, guiding me from another realm. Which was necessary for me to grow up. Unfortunately with a complex personality disorder. For what it's worth, since all these broken parts of me are mine and they make me ME.

Now, being here for more than 57 years, all the pieces of the puzzle are coming together. And I realise more than ever how the loss of my twin sister and a big secret, that was kept in our family led to the closure of my own heart and parts of my soul leaving my body at a very early age. Being an empath and highly sensitive, this was needed for me to survive. However, this means that some of these missing parts of my Soul hadn't returned home yet.

And those parts of my soul, is where I have been searching for! My search for answers and digging deep for the truth, have brought me so many valuable insights. It has given me hope. A strong sense of why I have been unable to really wholeheartedly love myself. I was incomplete.

And so I felt it was time....to turn around and embrace all unfelt pain and grief, which have been pushed away for so long. To discover that the fear itself was much greater than the actual situation.

In a healing session, these parts of my soul were returned to me. And I got to see my sister again.